THE PLAN TO BRING BAMBINO BACK
올해 페스티발에서 톱 커바댄스들을 불러 생방송으로 춤의 경쟁을 하는건 어떨까요?
So here’s how we get Hadam, Eunsol, Dahee & Minhee back on the stage. For real.
Ever ask yourself: “Why doesn’t KPOP Sexy Cover Dancing have live dance battles & contests to excite fans & make more money for the agencies & the girls?”
They have arranged battles in other sports & contests, where sexy women turn on fans by calling out opponents & rivals. They make a lot more money too. And these girls are not any more fit, hot or worshipped than our Cover Queens.
So I ask you BodhiCat Talk Army:
If Hana of Black Bunny was scheduled to dance against Hana of Switch next Fan Service Friday on a Live TV or PPV do you think you would watch? Do you also think that sponsors like Cass beer & Super Clothing would pay bucks to bring it live on YouTube?
Fuck yeah is the answer!! BodhiCat would sell his soul. OK, maybe something less corrupt. But you know what I’m sayin’ here.
BodhiCat Talk has studied hard – as in doctoral degree study hard – Bikini Fitness & Female Pro Wrestling.
In both of these “sports,” women have to be incredibly athletic, charismatic, toned & gorgeous.
Like Asuka (formerly Kana), the Japanese star:
Is that kind of a twerk, Asuka?
We luuv Asuka. We even wear the mask.
But the grappling booty of the WWE champ has nothing on Cover queens! The “rivalry” in pro wrestling is fake & it is Cover. Fanboys & especially fangirls would luuv to see the women of Cover go at it like this.
As far as booty shaking goes:
All together now….They already have the Dodger blue on. They are suited up, bootied up & ready to let their millions of fans slide right into them. Nothing would make us happier than to see Shasa & her team get filthy rich. I can see champagne slugging Shasa shouting with drunken stupor after putting it to Daisy of Momoland with a finishing booty move: “Do not mess with a woman who is the Queen of the Flies little girl!
So the plan is to turn Cover into a sport with cash prizes, gold medals & everything. BodhiCat Talk volunteers to put one around every girl’s neck, win or lose.
Choi Gwi Bi is the undefeated champion of Fitness competitions in Korea. She makes a ton of money for beating the shit out of other girls in bikinis & giving judges hardons.
We already have our Top 10 rankings. So a playoff system is the next thang.
HERE’S HOW IT WOULD WORK
This is not a new concept in KPOP. It ain’t complicated either.
Remember Ko Hara? Here she is raking in the bucks from a soju commercial.
First Time Soju paid the queen a ton for this amazing commercial.
She & her group Kara got into a tangle with Secret, which led to a real live dance battle in front of a massive crowd of Army soldiers.
The amazing battle between Secret & Kara was on TV & was a big time thrill.
Ko Hara was “Cover” for sure. She was a fierce “battle queen” (by her own admission) and figured Kara could dismantle Secret. Kara went first & were white hot!
Then it was Secret’s turn. It didn’t look like they had a shot, but Secret turned them inside out!!
Jieun sooo snapped!
Fan service? Can you imagine what Cover Dancers would do to please their happy fans with $100,000 on the line???
I-DULLS HAVE BEEN STEALING COVER CONCEPTS FOR A LONG TIME.
Time to return the favor.
Cover battles would be out of control. Crazy. Barrel rides over water falls. All kinds of stuff would go on if Hadam got into this game.
And with enough serious money on the line, you WILL attract Bambino back together. Hadam left the business without the money she deserved. She was tired of being slut-shamed & ripped off by the sludge buckets of JS Entertainment.
We know from ex-Dimepiece star Sally that Cover rivalries exist & the girls battle like crazy. But they are also friends off the stage & don’t talk about how much they want to beat each other & show their skills.
Well here’s their chance to do it without the usual fake humility bullshit.
#1 VS #2:
BOMI CALLS OUT GOEUN
“Who said YOU own GDFR?”
Could it get any better than to see Bomi – the champion of Cover right now – start off the KPOP Sexy Cover Dance Warriors Series by challenging GoEun to dance her iconic song?
Well yeah, it actually could.
The real BIG BANG. This is how the Universe was formed. With this burst a “New Thang” came about. (Image Courtesy of NASA. Sorry NASTA.)
HYUNA WOULD GET ANOTHER SHOT AT HADAM
Before she left Cover dancing as its queen Hadam brutally humiliated Hyuna in a battle video. Hadam had rolled up 80% of the votes.
But Hyuna & Hadam would have a rematch in real time & the two greatest performers we’ve ever seen can go toe-to-toe – with or without water.
Hyuna is so up for anything, she would for sure lust at a chance to whip anyone put in front of her. Especially Hadam. She’s a lioness.
Hyuna, who was humiliated by Hadam, seeks revenge.
But if Hadam gets in shape like she ws before Hyuna might get smoked a second time!!
The perfect dance. This clip of Hadam was used in the famous “Battle Video” between Hyuna & Hadam.
DAHEE & DAL SHABET COULD FINALLY SETTLE THE SCORE
The rumors have persisted forever. Even in 2019 Dahee’s stock is rising – and rising fast. For sure she could show Wohee & Serri (who made the snide gesture to her one night as Bambino left the stage) if she still has what it takes to steal their audience again!
The chick they call “The Game Changer” of Cover would really show her stuff to Dal Shabet this time.
You have seen our “battle videos” before. (Or at least you did until YouTube took the originals down. But a bud always gets them back up.)
Remember this one? Eunsol against Seolhyun. It was a major “battle” & Eunsol kicked her ass.
What if the two really did go at it live, on TV & on stage with a big audience of mainly Army dudes? Winner takes all: $200,000.
The matchups are endless. Fan ideas would flow. Versacejky would produce video masterpieces for them.
How about a night where the top challengers, I-Dulls or hot dancers like Juhee or EXID’s lightweight Junghwa정화, all try to take on GoEun doing “Horangnabi?”
The “Horangnabi Cup” would come with a $150,000 prize.
Juhee would actually get the respect she deserves! And damn, she might win it all.
There are so many Cover dance performances that just don’t get seen or only seen once or twice. It’s like throwing away Picasso paintings.
HA YOUNG WOULD GET A CHANCE TO TRY DUYOO AT THE AMAZING “COMING OF AGE (ADULT) CEREMONY” DANCE
This time in front of a large crowd. And Duyoo would finally do a cover she only did once again.
OR WE WOULD HAVE A “LIP & HIP” DEATH MATCH
Wouldn’t you like to see the amazing body of Captain Roh up against the equally amazing body of the Body of the Year, Seihee? How about with new choreo and interpretations from the choreographer of “New Thang?”
If you’ve never seen Captain Roh’s legs you are in for an amazing treat! She would use them to kick Rose Queen’s butt if go one-on-one with her & XOX.
Even the practice sessions would be televised like a pre-game show. And this time, with Laysha’s consent & with Laysha BEING PAID for the camera’s intrusion.
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Maybe the Cover girls would also get soju gigs – like this one. Which was also a “competition.”
A three way tie? The mind reels ya’ll. We have saved Cover!! Again…..
SOM & THE GIRLS OF COVER WITH “CULT” STATUS
Som has been battling some type of emotional upset lately. She talked about being betrayed & seeking revenge. She has now come to some peace with that & is just wishing whoever fucked her over floats by her down the river, face up. OK, Som. So when can we see you humping on stage again?
Somie is not just a great Cover dancer & legend of Laysha. She is also a cult figure. She has followers who are into her – like BodhiCat Talk – for her dark & mysterious hold over us. There are a few Cover Queens like this. We look at them this week on our other blog:
항상 편한 마음으로 답장주세요.
#respectlaysha #stopsucking #soju @mis_bless @kpopcoverdance